Russia's attack on Ukraine has sparked international outrage, and people around the world are feeling tense and afraid to watch the violence and wonder what will happen next.
Including your children. With so many images of violence and so few answers, your kids are probably aware of the fight, even if it's far away — and they might be scared.
Talking to children, especially young ones, about war can be difficult, and it may be better to keep your little one's joy by keeping the subject out of their awareness.
But just because they're not hearing it from you doesn't mean kids aren't getting the information elsewhere, said Lee Chambers, a psychologist based in the United Kingdom.
Chambers said it is possible to have developmentally appropriate and reassuring conversations with your children about the conflict between Russia and Ukraine, but it is important to be deliberate and attentive to your individual child.
"I don't think there is a one-size-fits-all approach," he said. "All kids are different."
Monitor tv
As adults worry about the state of the world, it can be tempting to keep the television on to keep up with every update – but psychologists say it could have an impact on children in the household.
Chambers said that children are like sponges, and often absorb more than we understand. Chambers said he would be paying close attention to images of bombs, missiles and violence.
Be open to questions
You can still stay informed, but be sure to provide context, said Wendy Rice, a psychologist based in Tampa, Florida.
"If you have especially young children, watch with them. If you're going to watch, they can ask some questions, and you can talk to them about what's going on," Rice said.
Your kids may be very curious, but if they aren't interested or have questions, that's okay too, she said.
Validate Feelings While Emphasizing Security
Chambers said in conversations with their children they should try to remind them that they are safe, while using age-appropriate language and avoiding generalizing war.
"I think it's important to make sure that you create a space for your child as a parent so that you feel settled before that discussion," he said.
But creating security should not come at the cost of invalidating their fears, said New York-based psychologist Chloe Carmichael. "Sometimes what they need most is knowing that they can express their feelings to an adult and that someone will take care of them.
"If they say something like 'Gee, I'm scared of this,' we don't want to say something like 'Don't be afraid,'" Carmichael said. "What they're feeling is really natural, so you can validate what you're saying like 'Yeah, you know, it's a scary situation, but I want to see if I can help you feel safe. How can I help?"
Find a way to take a relaxing action
It can also help to model for children that emotions shouldn't be managed until they're gone, said Carmichael, author of "Nervous Energy: Harness the can motivate you to take some kind of healthy action." The power of your concern."
Chambers said the action could mean looking for age-appropriate information together. Rice said it could also look like doing work and projects to raise money for charities supporting Ukraine or writing letters to soldiers.
Afterwards, check in and ask how that action made them feel, Carmichael said.
"Mark that feeling, and note that it was a positive emotion, even if it didn't fix the world," she said.
Remind Them It's OK to Have a Baby
Carmichael said it's great to teach children how to respond to stress by taking action and helping others, but it's also important for them to model so that they too can remain children and have fun.
Be sure to point out that helping others is important, but also that they also need to take care of themselves. Carmichael insists that the news be off, run outside and have fun together.
He said that at a time when the world seems uncertain, children can look to the adults in their lives to learn the value of taking a break and enjoying life.